We can be going through life, thinking that we know what we are doing, that we’ve got this, and then things just happen. The unexpected curve balls of life break the delusion that life is all about us and that we are in control of it. If we lived in ancient times we may have had a different view. Fate may have been our reason for the why’s and how’s of life, but I doubt that there are some old hags somewhere determining the outcome of our lives today.
I have been doing life for over 44 years now and I have begun to see a pattern emerge. Just when I see myself pulling inward, shutting down, becoming bitter and closed - a child enters my life.
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| Mother and Child by Helen Schjerfbeck |
I first encountered the wonder of children when I became a mother. Working through all that comes with motherhood makes you stronger, more vulnerable, and makes you look beyond yourself. It pulls you out. It grows you. You have to get up in the morning because someone else is dependent on you. You have to plan ahead and think of the future because you know this little person may not make it without you. Children point you to tomorrow, to what is important.
Teaching children also brings a bigger perspective to life. You see the learning process up close - hard, long, and magical all at the same time. You want to solve the problem of helping another person gain knowledge and skills so that they can make them their own. It energizes you. When you see the light go on in a student’s eyes and they begin to truly understand what they are learning, it is like being on holy ground. Walking with a disciple and then seeing them go off on their own is so fulfilling. You see the past connect to the future and it makes life so much bigger.
But beyond the two roles of mothering and teaching, God keeps sending me children to tell me one message - I see you, I hear you, I love you. Just this week I had three such encounters.
I received a note that both exhorted and humbled me. The insight and understanding, the purity of language and the reminders of what really matters touched me and caused me to look up. How can I give up when this younger person is running out ahead of me, calling me to get up and keep going? It was like receiving a note from God, through the hands of a child.
As I was gathering my things to head out the door after a church service, a little girl came up to me. A little seven year old looked me in the eye, smiled at me, and told me that she wanted me to know that she saw me. She told me that she had been looking for me to tell me that she liked the bracelet I wore two weeks ago. I felt tears well up as I heard God say through the voice of a little child, I am the God that sees you and nothing escapes my gaze.
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| Hagar and Ishmeal by Miles Carl |
Another time this week I was sitting alone in a room full of people, fighting lonely thoughts, and a smiling young woman came and entered into a genuine conversation with me. She really did want to know how I was. She sought me out, out of a room full of her own peers. She befriended me in that moment and I felt the love of God.
We can learn about faith and love from those younger and less experienced than us. They have not had the accumulation of hardships that wear on our souls and threaten to steal away our joy, energy, and love. As older adults we often fight the battle of the mind. We work to overcome the self preserving lies that lure us into believing that maybe we can control our lives enough to ward off more emotional pain. Our fight is one of tearing down strongholds that we have helped to build. We have created towers and bulwarks out of our own fears, resting them on the cracked and rotting foundations of our attempts to control our lives.
“Unless you turn and become like children you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 18:3-4. This can be one of the most daunting phrases in Scripture. To let go, walk away from whatever false safety I had and to look to Christ, to take a simple step of faith and follow Him, can be frightening. I need children to model this beauty and purity of love, a faith that trusts in Christ alone.
In a world where truths become lies and children become increasingly more vulnerable, let us look to affirm the inherent God-given worth of a child’s life. Let us hold their hands and thank them for loving us and being just who God made them to be. My kids aren’t perfect sinless saints and neither are yours, but they are amazing conduits of God’s mercy and grace. Let us thank them and love them by continuing to walk by faith, even the faith of a child.
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| The Happy Family by Ferdinand Waldmuller |
Children need us. But somehow I believe that we need them more. May our children live long enough to find that one day, they may need the love of a child to save them too.
~ Your Fellow Sojourner
