Tonight we were serenaded by a very bad rendition of “Happy Birthday” in English followed by a very cool rendition of “Happy Birthday” in Chinese. Our twins, Liam and Winston, turned 5 today. All they wanted was to “go to Chinese” and to have a birthday cake (one chocolate cake with black icing and a spy on top, the other vanilla with green icing and a tractor on top – I had to talk him out of the blueberries and pudding on top as well) and of course, presents.
So, we returned to a familiar place for our family, the Chinese buffet. Chris and I could predict what would happen. And as always, we were right. We were rock stars from the moment we walked in. Why you might ask? The reason is because of our children.
The phenomena began with my first pregnancy, when we still had money to eat out more often. Whenever we would go to our favorite Chinese restaurant, the owner had to come out and talk with us. He made a prediction “It will be a boy.” Followed by a familiar admonition ,”You have more, lots more!”
As God added children to our family, it was only at Chinese restaurants that we gained instant celebrity status. All the young girls and women would flock over to our table and touch our children and giggle and talk in rapid Chinese to one another. And if you think that wasn’t bad enough, enter twins. Twins took it up a notch. All of the women who worked in the place would pile out, to come and see “the twins”. We were just hoping that they would invite us back after they saw the mess we left behind.
Chris and I started to connect some dots and we came up with our own theory. Could this theory be substantiated by others? We do not know, but we still hold to our “Children in a Chinese Restaurant” theory.
We knew of China’s one child policy and could only imagine the pain and heartache this evil policy must cause in China. (Article on China's One Child Policy) But, we are not in China. We are in America. So, here where we have freedom to have as many children as the good Lord gives, why the awe in these Chinese people? Could it be that they are seeing something they would never have seen in their native land? A table filled with children, all from the same nuclear family? Could there be a longing in their hearts to be parents that are flanked by children instead of doting on the one prince or princess the government has allowed them to raise? Could it be the longing of an unfulfilled heart?
As I watched my sons blow out their birthday candles tonight, I had a thought. Do I celebrate children like these Chinese people do? Do I shake my head in awe and cluck my tongue because there are no words to describe the amazement of it all? Do I see them and cherish them for the miracles that they are?
Something else happened tonight. First, a woman who was sitting near by came up to me and said, “I have been watching your beautiful family. I knew they must have a mother who spends a lot of time with them.” My response, “Really?!” I know my faults and I certainly do not mother my children as I ought. The second intriguing thing about tonight was how the Chinese woman who hovered over us tonight called me “the MaMa” in a very honoring way. She chatted away with me and always wanted to know if I was ok and singled me out. She even told me she was my friend. It was her way of saying, “Blessed are you among women…” She was rising and calling me blessed.
I find it interesting that all of this comes tonight, as I have been feeling increasingly defeated as a mother. I need much reforming in my life and I know that my children suffer the brunt of my lack. I need to see my children through the eyes of the Chinese, who are watching their sons and daughters be thrown away.
I am so ungrateful for the blessings in my life, including my own children. This is one of the greatest sins, ungratefulness. To despise a gift that has come down from the Father of lights grieves me. So, as I feel the daily temptation to fight for my own life instead of serving the life of another, let me remember Lord. Teach me to let the little children come. Do not let me come to see what I have been given until it has gone. Let me live with my children today and let the thankfulness of a grateful heart permeate all of me. Let me rise in the morning and agree that yes, I am blessed.
~Your Fellow Sojourner
